PICKS WEEK 9!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alright I'm rolling deep now. I'm over .500 and ready to go undefeated. On top of this Jacksonville is 4-4, and Florida is 5-3 and one week away from being confirmed into the SEC championship. The NFC has probably got a huge fear boner for the SFC this week. So without further ado here are my picks, note that I am done picking margin of victory because it is near impossible.

Game of the Week: Chronic Habsturbators vs. Red Tiger

The Chronic Habsturbators once thought they had it all. After a clutch add of Pierre Garcon their owner can be quoted for saying "13-1! 13-1! 13-1." To make a short story long he is now 5-3. This two game slump has left Jonathan wondering a lot of things about life. Why do his parents not love him? Why is the other side of the bed so cold? Why has the entire SNFL gotten with his sister? Meanwhile John Lee pulled off a close one against themadoompaloompas, shutting down their late season turnaround. It's gonna be a close one for SFC dominance.

Who wins it: The Chronic Habsturbators

Why?: Jonathan has found solace in masturbating to a mediocre hockey team, so his focus has returned. Also CJ2K is out.

Game 2: Core Protection 4Ever vs. Las Tortugas Negras

Core Protection 4Ever is rocking a 6 game losing streak, the worst in SNFL history. After losing back to back MNF heartbreakers, he is pissed off and wanting to take his anger out on the first team that gets in his way. That team is Las Tortugas Negras, and they aren't going to take a thrashing sitting down. This is an SFC Pridematch at its finest. A win from CP4E would put them back into the playoffs race, while a win from Las Tortugas Negras would only solidify their 3rd place ranking.

Who wins it: Core Protection 4Ever

Why?: This game is just too important. Owner Fred Varn is very talented at getting his team to focus when it counts and with playoffs on the line he is going to get his team into it. Las Tortugas Negras don't stand a chance

Game 3: themadoompaloompas vs. The Disciples of Eleven

There were murmurs of a comeback from the once 0-5 madoompaloompas. After a close loss to Red Tiger in what has become known as the "pillow fight of the year" suffice it to say that the comeback has been shut down. The Disciples of Eleven aren't ready to give up their playoff berth despite the fact that they have posted two Worst of All Time scores in the SNFL.

Who wins it: The Disciples of Eleven

Why?: SFC vs. NFC. SFC wins as always.

Game 4: The DAWGS vs. The Carnegie PantyRaiders

The DAWGS have been causing a ruckus in the SNFL with their anti SFC articles. This kind of prejudice is frowned upon. No one really cares about this game because its two NFC teams but I have to pick it anyway because apparently both of these teams have a shot at being SNFL Champion (but seriously the idea of an NFC SNFL Champion is laughable).

Who wins it: The DAWGS

Why?: After The Carnegie PantyRaiders MNF bullshit against Core Protection they don't deserve to win another game and probably won't. They used all their luck on one game and now their team is going to be revealed for what it really is.

Game 5: The Ox vs. The Fear Boners (Mud Eaters)

Once again, another NFC matchup. Honestly who gives a fuck! Apparently it is the top 2 NFC teams playing each other but that equates to turtles running a footrace. The Mud Eaters escaped last week in MNF and their best player is arguably their kicker. The Ox stands strong quietly making a case for himself as best in the SNFL.

Who wins it: The Ox

Why?: Honestly I had to think about this one. Both teams look decent this week. I'm calling the Ox in an upset though on the sole purpose that one team's luck can only last for so long.

So there you have it.

Also some poser posted picks for me last week. Here were my real picks:

Core Protection 3D vs. The Mud Eaters: The Mud Eaters

Team Canuckistan vs. The Ox: Team Canuckistan

themadoompaloompas vs. Red Tiger: themadoompaloompas

The DAWGS vs. The Disciples of Eleven: The Disciples of Eleven

Las Tortugas Negras vs. The Carnegie PantyRaiders: Las Tortugas Negras

With that said my record currently is 19-16.

Good luck beating me this week. I'll announce the winners (aka none) in a special post next week.